Getting Sworn At, Mean Cop, and Laughs

I think the only way I maintain my sanity is humor. That and a good dose of help from above. This is the second day in a row that I have been sworn at by a student. Maybe I should consider it to be some sort of hitting streak or something. Move over, Joe DiMaggio. I wonder what will happen tomorrow? To be honest, I really hope I don't have as eventful days for the next fifty-six. It could be a long spring.

The stories: yesterday a student exploded at me in my study hall after I told him for about the fifth time to take his assigned seat. "_______ you, are you happy now?" he exclaimed as he finally went to his seat. He'll probably get suspended (at least I hope he does, swearing at a teacher is kind of like a big no no that usually results in harsh repercussions. Or at least I think it should be.) Then today, as I was breaking up what was the makings of a fight between a couple of guys outside during my lunch, I told one of them to come with me, and he responded with something like "No way, you _____" and refused to comply. Too bad for him that someone else in the courtyard knew his name. I learned it, and reported it to the proper authorities. Three days suspension for him, whittled down from five because he gave the name of the student who he was going to fight. This nameless guy had refused to surrender his name, despite my request. So now it will be a suspension for him as well, as refusal to give your name to a teacher is an automatic one day vacation minimum.

Then a student comes to me after school today and practically begs for some way to bring up his third quarter grade from an F. The quarter ended last week. If he had made an effort to make up things before, when he had plenty of opportunity to do so, I would have been glad to help him. But now it's too little, too late. Unfortunately for him, this means he's academically ineligible to play baseball. He's on the varsity team. So now I guess I'm a mean cop for breaking up fights and failing varsity athletes. I feel slightly bad for my student, as I usually lean toward mercy when it comes to allowing makeup work, but you have to draw a line somewhere, and this student went significantly beyond it.

On the lighter side, I had my students peer edit their major research papers. Students were instructed to make comments and do editing however it was needed. It was anonymous, so they had some freedom to cast off inhibition, though they were not supposed to be mean. I don't know if this editor realized I would read the comment he/she put or not, but I laughed long and hard after seeing it in the margin of a paper: "Oh oh. Oh boy. ________'s [my last name] going to ream you out like a stack of papers! Where's your citation!? It's not common knowledge! Fix it & redeem yourself!" Apparently my message regarding plagiarism has sunk into the skull of at least one student. Small victories, that's what teaching is all about...

The Typical Teenage Mind

A recent comment made by one of my students gives insight into the way I think most teenagers' minds operate.

The context: I'm planning on showing part of a war film in class, that, while unrated, deserves an R rating for its content, so I am requiring parents sign a permission form before I show their children the film.

The comment by a seventeenish girl, upon hearing about the permission form: "Oh, I love films that need permission forms. That means they're good."

See what I deal with on a daily basis? Ya gotta love it.

David and the Cyclops

This is too good not to share. I don't have the exact words in front of me, but a freshman in my World History class wrote a description along these lines on a recent test:

"Michelangelo's David was a sculpture of the David in the Bible who defeated the giant cyclops." I guess the cyclops part was one of those things my Sunday School teacher overlooked in her lesson. It's too bad I missed that part, it kind of adds a nice touch to the story.